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January 07, 2006

Assorted Nuts

I'm showing some Linky Love for Martinis, Peristence, and a Smile today, because there have been some pretty good tidbits on there lately.

First, Ben Asslick had forgotten his wallet when he went out to buy diapers for baby Violet, and wound up having to kiss a fan who offered to pay for said diapers.

Now, folks, it isn't like the Garner-Afflecks are hurting for money, have they ever heard of stocking up on that sort of stuff? Do I have to start sending them diaper coupons? Babies don't stop poopin' just because you have no Pampers!

As was stated, and linked to, the other day, the Cruise-Holmes marriage looks doubtful. My guess is that Katie's parents have been getting to her, making her really think and question this whole "relationship" with Cruise. But can't you just imagine the conversation over dinner at the Toledo home of the Holmes family?

"Mr. and Mrs. Holmes, you do not know marriage and childbirth. I do. I've read the research. You're glib!"

*snort*

Jennifer Aniston, caught up in the spirit and goodwill of the Christmas season, placed a call to ex-hubby Brad ArmPitt...and got Angelina instead. That Jennifer Aniston...glutton for punishment???

I'm not saying Angelina Jolie isn't hot and all, but she must be a real pistol in the sack if she got Pitt away from Jen. Is it me, or does Pitt seem totally whipped?

Nick Lachey liked to wear Jessica Simpson's shoes. And he likes to cry. And talk dirty. Picture this, if you will: Nick Lachey teetering toward you in a pair of Manolo Blahniks, tears streaming down his face, uttering "You dirty whore, who's your daddy? Yeah, you know you want it, you filthy bitch."

Oh dear, that my tender, innocent fingers could have typed such filth. How do I know that stuff??? *snort*

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Posted by Groovyvic at 09:32 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)
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Nick Lachey teetering toward you in a pair of Manolo Blahniks, tears streaming down his face, uttering "You dirty whore, who's your daddy? Yeah, you know you want it, you filthy bitch."

I just snorted coffee, but the pain was worth it. Unfortunately I'm doomed to have that image in my head well beyond the point where it stops amusing me. Ah, well. The price of humor.

;)

Posted by: Jim at January 7, 2006 11:56 AM

Oh gosh groovy. I needed that! Hilarious. Keep em' coming my dear. I'm lovin' it.

Posted by: thirdee at January 7, 2006 01:46 PM

I am crying here. You are killing me.

Posted by: Julie at January 7, 2006 04:57 PM

Way too funny!

But, you know, it was Angelina who called Jen to let her know that there's going to be a little Jolie-ArmPitt in a few months. It was all a karma thing. She wanted to let Jen know so that she wouldn't have bad karma by keeping it from her! MMMuuuwwwwaaaaahahahahaha!

Posted by: Anna at January 7, 2006 11:28 PM