June 23, 2008

"Ferris Bueller, You're My Hero"

Found this bit thanks to Agent Bedhead, and all I have to say is...so what?

Ferris Bueller and Carrie Bradshaw Matthew Broderick and SJP smoke.

Now look, I don't necessarily condone smoking, even though I miss that bitch nicotine like crazy, but I know it's bad for the health. I've LIVED second-hand smoke, people, you don't have to tell me!

But it would seem that the fruit of Broderick's loins has expressed curiosity about the cancer sticks, and I say, what the f*ck do you expect to happen if you smoke in front of him?

My mother smoked when I was a kid (explains a lot, huh?) and I very clearly remember sitting at the kitchen table studying her UNFILTERED Pall Mall. I was probably, oh, six at the time and do you know what I did? I picked that bastard up and took a puff.

No, I didn't become a smoker at six years of age, but you can see where I'm going with this, right? It was at that point, coughing and hacking and stinking, that I vowed NEVER to drink OR smoke.

Ha!

And yeah, there were many trips back to my dorm at Cesspool of Liberalism U. that I bitched about my freshly laundered clothing (that I washed, mind you) smelling like smoke because of my mom. But being the RAVING hypocrite that I am, I started smoking while at Cesspool U.

So, get over Broderick, mmkay? Kids will do those sorts of stupid things.

Now I want a cigarette, dammit!